Epic Fail: A Review of Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash: The Nightmare Warriors

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Franchise crossovers are tricky things. They can be a blast when characters from different narrative universes meet in a single setting and share an adventure, or beat the crap out of each other, or beat the crap out of each other and then share an adventure. This stuff isn't high art; it's more of a treat for franchise fans than anything else, which is good news if you're a franchise fan.

However, even fan-friendly stuff like crossovers still have to obey a few rules to be enjoyable stories and not just meandering, clueless cash-ins of popular franchise brand names. For starters, it helps to provide some kind of balance between the franchises that appear in the story, so that both sides have some kind of direct involvement in the story. There's a big difference between a crossover and a guest appearance: Fans of a particular franchise in a crossover will feel cheated if their side doesn't get enough time in the spotlight, and it won't help the crossover narrative achieve a sense of tonal and plot consistency if certain elements just seem forced into the story with little sense of explanation or continuity.

To ensure that narrative balance is achieved, the franchises within the crossover should share some kind of thematic commonality. Dark Horse's original Aliens vs. Predator comic book miniseries worked well because both franchises dealt with killer extraterrestrials, so it didn't require much narrative acrobatics to explain what these two monsters were doing together in the same story. (In contrast, one of the more frustrating aspects of the Alien vs. Predator movie was the "ancient astronaut" subplot that took up so much time but didn't add much to the story, except to provide a convoluted excuse as to why the movie takes place in the arctic.) The same applies to Robocop vs. Terminator: Both franchises revolve around technology that has run amok, so it doesn't take much effort to put them together in the same setting. On the other hand, when two franchises that have nothing in common are forced together into the same story, the results can be ugly. Case in point: The DC Universe/Looney Tunes comic book crossover, two franchises that share no commonality other than that Warner Brothers owns both of them.


This brings me to the focus of this post, my review of Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash: The Nightmare Warriors. Nightmare Warriors is billed as third part of the Freddy vs. Jason "trilogy", with the first two parts being the Freddy vs. Jason movie and the Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash comic book miniseries. Read on for my review of Nightmare Warriors, which includes a brief look back at its two predecessors.

When Freddy vs. Jason came out back in 2003, I thought it was a hoot. I enjoyed seeing Robert Englund playing Freddy Krueger one last time, and Ronny Yu's direction featured the right blend of gory horror and violent lunacy. The subplot involving the Westin Hills psychiatric facility and Hypnocil not only made ample use of ideas introduced in previous Nightmare on Elm Street movies, but it also provided an effectively morbid counterweight to the alliance/conflict between Freddy and Jason. Yet the most remarkable thing about this crossover was how long it took to happen at all and when it finally did happen, it was worth the wait. The studios first considered this crossover back in 1987, and it resulted in 18 unused scripts before Freddy vs. Jason was actually made (see the extras on the DVD for more details). Click here for some additional thoughts on Freddy vs. Jason.


The success of Freddy vs. Jason prompted the studios to consider a sequel (naturally), and one of the sequel ideas that quickly bubbled to the surface was to add the character of Ashley "Ash" Williams from the Evil Dead movies to the mix. A treatment for Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash was drafted, but never produced. So while a sequel to Freddy vs. Jason remains unmade, Wildstorm and Dynamite Entertainment later contacted Jeff Katz, the author of the Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash treatment, to work with James Kuhoric to rework the treatment into a six-issue comic book miniseries.

I picked up the trade paperback collection of Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash after it was published in September 2007. It's not as good as Freddy vs. Jason, the artwork by Jason Craig is very uneven, and I doubt that it would've worked as a movie. Nevertheless, Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash has its share of noteworthy moments for avid fans. It incorporates enough elements from each of the three franchises so that it feels like a complete, coherent story. Perhaps the most intriguing idea in this crossover story was the suggestion that Jason Vorhees' mother used the Necronomicon to bring Jason back from the dead (a plot thread that was hinted at in the ninth Friday the 13th movie), which is how Freddy learns about the cursed book. It's also fun to see Ash's car again, his seemingly indestructible 1973 Oldsmobile Delta 88 Royale--it's the same car that makes cameo appearances in many of Sam Raimi's other films outside of the Evil Dead series.

Katz, Kuhoric and Craig came back in 2009 to do Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash: The Nightmare Warriors. Nightmare Warriors was originally slated to be a twelve issue miniseries, but it was cut down to six issues. Katz and Kuhoric aimed to tell a much more ambitious story in this sequel, setting it up to serve as a definitive ending to the stories of several surviving characters from the Friday the 13th and Nightmare on Elm Street movies. Unfortunately, while Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash is an amusing romp, Nightmare Warriors is an ambitious disappointment.

Katz and Kuhoric obviously didn't trim their original idea for a sequel when the miniseries' number of issues was cut from twelve to six. Nightmare Warriors tries to fit too many characters and plot threads into a narrative space that's too small to accommodate them and as a result, it becomes little more than a collage of franchise parts that never really fit together into a whole story. Reading it felt like reading Katz and Kuhoric's Friday the 13th and Nightmare on Elm Street fanboy wish list, not a gleefully gruesome story that horror fans crave. The characters feel interchangeable and its two intersecting plot arcs--the assembly of a support group for Freddy and Jason survivors and the government's interest in the Necronomicon--read like shallow, uninspired excuses to bring the characters together instead of actual plot arcs. As before, Craig's quality of artwork continues to vary from page to page, thus further dulling the story's overall visual impact.

Such narrative overcrowding of Nightmare Warriors leads it to its biggest flaw, at least as crossovers go: a lack of balance between the participating franchises. There are so many characters and ideas from the Friday the 13th and Nightmare on Elm Street franchises that the Evil Dead components of the story--namely Ash, the Necronomicon, and the Deadites--feel like they've been pushed aside and only serve the story in the most perfunctory sense. If anything, such an imbalance calls attention to the fact that the Evil Dead franchise isn't a slasher franchise, thus making Ash's placement in the story that much more awkward. Katz and Kuhoric's plot point that slasher attack survivors have an inner strength that makes them much more capable of beating supernatural villains would've worked perfectly within the Hack/Slash comic book series (say, Freddy vs. Jason vs. Hack/Slash) than with a crossover that involves Evil Dead.


Had Katz and Kuhoric kept their ambitions in check and paid closer attention to what makes crossovers succeed, Nightmare Warriors could have been a great miniseries. Since Nightmare Warriors was intended to be a concluding chapter in a trilogy, it should have been a story that expands directly from Freddy vs. Jason and Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash instead of returning to two of the original franchises to continue their stories. For example, since she brought Jason back from the dead by using the Necronomicon, Pamela Vorhees could have returned in the third part of the trilogy as some kind of Deadite witch (think of something along the lines of the cellar ghoul from Evil Dead 2) who has a seething grudge against both Freddy and Ash for what they did to her boy in the previous two chapters--imagine the kind of awesome bloodbath that would have been!

In summary, I can't recommend Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash: The Nightmare Warriors, even to die-hard fans of Freddy, Jason and Ash. Horror buffs are better off satiating their crossover cravings elsewhere.


Heroes and Villains of the Spectrum - Red

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I thought it would be fun (and a personal challenge) to try and make a few lists of the characters out there who insist on putting a color in their names. Sometimes it's painfully obvious and unnecessary, and sometimes it's a little weird (Red Skull). Let's kick it off with the color red...

Red Tornado


He's the android who became human who became an android again.

He was originally part of the Justice Society for a brief time before a crossover event caused him to come to our universe to enlist the aid of the JLA in saving the JSA.

He's one of those characters whose backgrounds are so convoluted it's hard to keep up with what really happened or where he really came from. Still, it's a pretty safe bet that he'll be back in the JLA books someday. He's sort of like a standard, like the Martian Manhunter.


Red Robin

This particular hero has been three versions of Robin: Dick Grayson (in "Kingdom Come"), Jason Todd (during "Countdown"), and most recently Tim Drake (in his own series). 

It's hard to say who did the best job of playing the part, mainly because Dick Grayson's version was relegated to roughly two pages of action in the miniseries. If we had to cast a vote, however, I think Jason Todd's version held the most promise. Unfortunately, as soon as "Countdown" ended, the writers threw him out of the costume as soon as possible with no explanation as to why.

Red Hood

The first Red Hood became the Joker, but Jason Todd (who was killed by the Joker) decided to use the moniker when he came back from the dead for some reason. He became this brutal Punisher type character, killing criminals before eventually trying to force Batman to kill the Joker himself.

Jason has long been the loose cannon of the DC Universe, finding meaning and direction during his trips through the multiverse in search of Ray Palmer. As Red Robin, he avenged his own death and that of one of the multiverse's Batman versions by killing a version of the Joker. Now he's back to being the Red Hood and just showing up as needed. He was supposedly killed during the Battle for the Cowl fight with Dick Grayson, but there's no doubt he'll be back one day soon.

Rocket Red

Russia's knight in shining armor, this character is more of a team rather than a single unit. 

For a while, he was a member of the Justice League International, and helped out on a lot of missions.

Lately, the character has been relegated to second-tier status with a few menacing appearances in Green Lantern, and a guest shot or two in the old "Justice League Unlimited" cartoon series.

Red Guardian

Another hero whose choice of color in his name was due more to political leanings than anything else, Red Guardian was supposed to be like Russia's answer to Captain America. While he was a rather acrobatic character, he didn't initially have a shield and the fin on his head was a little weird.

Eventually he was killed off and his girlfriend took his place. She actually managed to get a pretty cool power set with flight and energy beams, while the original had nothing more than skill and luck to keep him alive for as long as it did.

He even got an action figure several years back. Quite an accomplishment for such an almost-forgotten character.


Red Skull

Slated to become the bad guy in the newest Captain America film (did you forget he was the bad guy in the 90's movie as well?), this guy has been around forever and a day.

For some reason, he's pretty much been relegated to little more than Captain America's version of the Joker. He's out there coming up with master plan after master plan and failing each time. He dies, he comes back. He dies again, he comes back again. For some reason, Marvel just believes this man is vital to keeping Captain America stories relevant and alive...even though the Red Skull hasn't succeeded in anything in decades.

Red Arrow

Decades after running with the name "Speedy" for some reason, Roy Harper finally took the name he was meant to have: Red Arrow. Giving everyone a taste of what we saw in "Kingdom Come", Red Arrow's creation was a nod to that great graphic novel and a welcome addition to the Justice League. He even surprised Green Arrow when they asked Roy to the team instead.

He's gone back to being Arsenal now (and he's lost his arm, which isn't good for any archer), but for a time he carried the bow. Who knows...the way comic books go he may return there again.


Honorable Mention: Crimson Avenger

Lee Travis fought crime sort of like a cross between the Shadow, the Green Hornet, and the Spider. He was around in the 40's and was even included as one of the original Seven Soldiers of Victory.

Unfortunately, he left this understated costume for a weird fin-on-his-head thing (what is up with that look? Who decided that looked normal?) and took on a teen sidekick.

This is another character who made a guest shot in the Justice League Unlimited series, with his own full-length story in the comic book.

Next week, we take a look at another color in the spectrum! By the way, the only "Lantern" who will count is Green Lantern. It's not fair when you have one of every color out there.

Coming this Weekend: After Dark Horrorfest 5

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I'm usually able to say ahead of things when it comes to upcoming horror film releases, but this one really blindsided me: In select theaters this upcoming weekend, After Dark Horrorfest 5 will be showing eight never-before-seen horror films.

I'm used to hearing about After Dark Horrorfests happening in October, so to have one happening in January is a bit surprising. Even though After Dark has showcased horror films with a wide degree of quality over the years, it nevertheless has found some great films that probably would never have been on the big screen any other way. Previous entries that are definitely worth a second look include The Abandoned and The Broken; from this year's selections, Husk looks to be very promising.


Check out the After Dark Horrorfest site and Facebook page for more details about this weekend's event and which theaters will be participating. Beyond Hollywood also has some information about this year's selection of films, including a few of their trailers.

DC Brings Their Prices Down

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A busy week in comics news this week as we throw out another post!

DC recently made the announcement that starting in January they were dropping the prices of all their books (with the exception of annuals and double-sized books) to $2.99 in response to the fans. Somehow it finally dawned on them that $4 a book for 22 pages of action was a tad steep. Now it's $3 a book for 20 pages of action, which is a trade-off I suppose. They want the fans to start trying newer titles.

What about you? Will this make you give more titles a shot, or are you just going to be a satisfied customer with the titles you already go with?

On a different note, did anyone ever imagine there would come a day when Green Lantern would be the focal character for DC on a splash ad rather than Superman or Batman? I mean, he's shooting his ring into the sand for some reason, but he's right there leading the pack!

Wizard and Toy Fare Magazines Both Officially Dead

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Pardon the extra post this week, but I just had to jump in here with this after finding out the news.

Yesterday was no fun at all as I found out two of my favorite comic and toy-related magazines have just bit the bullet. Wizard Magazine and Toy Fare are both officially dead...as in "instantly". No warning, no explanation, just canceled.

While I'm the first to admit Wizard Magazine passed its heyday a year or more ago (thanks to the new format they adopted), it was still a highlight of my month to see it arrive in the mail around the 26th. I found a lot of really cool stuff in there, and especially liked some of the articles.

The real bummer here is the death of Toy Fare. I really just discovered the book in 2009 and had a subscription since (I had grabbed the occasional issue, but nothing constant until then). I can't count the number of statues and toys I've rushed to the computer to pre-order after seeing them in full-color in the book. They seemed to have a jump on Previews and just about anywhere else. I have no idea where to go from here to get my statue and toy news fix.

The unfortunate thing is that Toy Fare seemed to stay strong in content. While Wizard suffered and seemed to really just be printing filler crap there towards the end, Toy Fare consistently had good information.

All of this as Wizard Entertainment announced they'd be continuing the Wizard World Conventions...but now that they've killed the advertising monster they had every month in print I have no idea how they intend to get the word out there about it. They are still planning on going with a digital magazine called "Wizard World" starting next month, but I guess I'm still old school because I prefer my magazines in print. I don't mind reading blog posts and such, but an entire magazine on my computer doesn't appeal to me. And no, I don't own an iPad--and this won't be the thing that sways me to drop $600 on one either.

So now we have a gaping void out there. Who will rush to fill it...or has the internet truly killed the market for print magazines?

Stupid Origins

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I promise you, I understand that comic books are just for fun. I know that no irradiated spider will give you super powers, and there are no aliens out there passing out green rings, but there are some origins that are so stupid you have to laugh when you read it. Here are some of the worst:

Hawk and Dove

I love these guys, I need to say that up front. Hank and Don Hall remain my favorite duo team of all time, but the origin is a little weird. They're locked in a shed and want a way to help their father before he is killed by gangsters. A mysterious voice starts talking and offers them power to help and thus the heroes are born.

I have mentioned many things I wanted in my life and have yet to have a mysterious voice answer and offer me superpowers. I'm a tad disappointed.

It would be over 20 years before anyone attempted to explain where the powers came from in an issue of "Secret Origins". Apparently, it was from a talking dragon. No lie.

Whizzer

Besides having one of the worst names for a superhero in history (yeah, you know what you're thinking when you hear that name and it has nothing to do with running fast), he also has one of the worst origins.

Where does he get his speed? Is it from a lightning strike to chemicals? Maybe an alien beam? Nope. He was in Africa on a trip, and got bitten by a cobra so they gave him a transfusion of mongoose blood. This, in turn, gave him super-speed.

Now, last time I checked, a mongoose isn't a speedster. They may be quick little buggers, but they don't outrun cars or anything. Just imagined how powerful he'd been if they'd given him a little cheetah blood! He'd have been faster than light! And speaking of speedsters...

Kid Flash/Wally West

Lightning strikes chemicals and makes a police scientist a superhero. I can live with that, believe it or not. What bothers me is how they reused the origin exactly--in the same place even--with Kid Flash!

Almost 30 years later they would try to offer an explanation as to why it happened (Speed Force, Flash as a lightning bolt, etc), but that wasn't what they originally had in mind. Originally this was just an easy out in an attempt to create a sidekick for the Flash so they could cash in on Robin's popularity in the Batman titles.

There was any number of ways they could have done this, but this is one instance where I think the writers just got lazy.



In other news, Marvel announced it is getting out of the "All Ages" comics after Captain America: The First Avenger goes out in April. What do you think? Does anyone read all ages comics now anyway? Does this mean "Superhero Squad" will now have Nick Fury dropping the F bomb as he splats MODOK with ice cream?

Building a Better Space Invader: War Of The Worlds Alien Creature Model Kit by Pegasus Hobbies

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I just noticed this the other day: Pegasus Hobbies has recently released an alien creature model kit based on the invaders from the 2005 version of War of the Worlds.


While model kits of the alien invaders and the manta ray-like war machines from the 1953 version of War of the Worlds are in no short supply, this is the first model kit I've seen that's based on something from Steven Spielberg's version of the classic H.G. Wells' novel. This highly detailed kit comes with a logo display base and an alternate neck for posing options, and Monsters in Motion currently has it on sale for a pretty low price. Now all we need is for Pegasus Hobbies to release a model kit of the jellyfish-like, ethereal tripods from the same movie, and we'll have a complete set ready to terrorize Tom Cruise all over again.

Killer Machines Love Killing People, But REAL Killer Machines Love Ducati Motorcycles (and Killing People)

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A bit of sci-fi film trivia: What do The Matrix, Terminator and Tron franchises have in common, other than human-hating A.I. programs that run wildly amok? Ducati motorcycles, apparently.

Ducati has been making its rounds in Hollywood's product placement division, but for some reason it has become a recurring feature in movies that feature homicidal computers and their legions of deadly mechanical minions. Here's a brief timeline of Ducati's relationship with our future machine overlords:
  • In Matrix Reloaded (2003), Trinity rode a dark green 2001 Ducati 996 during the freeway chase scene. A 998 version of this bike was sold at dealerships starting in 2003 as part of a Matrix promotional tie-in.
  • In Terminator Salvation (2009), the filmmakers used Ducati’s popular Hypermotard 1100 as inspiration for the design of Skynet's Moto-Terminator units (see below). Actual Hypermotard bikes were also used for stunt scenes in the film. The Ducati bikes were a new addition this franchise's long list of motorcycles used by both human and cyborg characters.

 


  • In Tron Legacy (2010), both Kevin Flynn and his son Sam are avid Ducati fans, and Sam's proficiency with riding his Ducati bike plays a key role in his success in the deadly Light Cycle games in the virtual world of The Grid.
I guess the moral of the story here is that killer machines really do love Italian motorcycles, and are inclined to stalk and kill humans who can ride them like champions. However, there's no word so far on whether Borgs, Cybermen, Cylons or Daleks will be purchasing Ducati bikes anytime soon.

Characters That Need To Go

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For some reason, a writer or editor can fall in love with a particular character and will do their best to keep them alive by bringing them into any series they can. No matter what they do, the hero just can't carry the momentum necessary for a full-time series and yet that stubborn editor or writer won't let them go, forcing readers to sit through their adventures while waiting for something much better to come along.

Here are some heroes who just can't carry a series and aren't interesting anymore, no matter how you dress them up...

The Black Panther

Ok, how many chances has this guy had? He's had his own series a number of times, and I even heard how it was award-winning and all that, but I honestly never met anyone who was reading it. In my local comic shop, that stack was never touched and eventually the owner stopped ordering the title altogether. We get it: he's a king and he's a bad dude...but he's a lousy superhero.

Truthfully, how many times has he saved the day for the Avengers by taking down some major villain? What makes him so unique that he should stand out above other acrobatic-only heroes like White Tiger, Daredevil, Nighthawk, or even Robin, for crying out loud?

Now he's taking over Hell's Kitchen for Daredevil while Matt's away getting his mind right. What's after that? Maybe they'll give him Captain America's shield while Bucky's in prison, or Spider-Man's web-shooters while Peter's swimming through the mire of his own title. Whatever it is, folks probably won't be interested.

Cyclops

Probably the worst team leader of all time, Cyclops lands here simply because he's the one X-Men who most deserves death and yet never dies. They kill Banshee, Thunderbird, Phoenix (a half dozen times) and yet this guy lives forever.

What leadership has he offered that makes him worthy of leading? If you answered "I don't know", then you're absolutely right!

The writers try every way possible to make him this noble leader, but he seems to always make bad decisions and/or take this tyrant approach. Not only that, but he's lost so many fights over the years it becomes impossible to take his threats seriously. They should give him a noble death and let the character move on.

Wonder Woman

Now this one may tick a few folks off, but let's be honest about it: since Gail Simone left there just hasn't been much steam in this book. DC has treated this character as one of their "Trinity" characters, but she hasn't really been a heavy hitter since the 70's. Batman has dozens of graphic novel collections, while Wonder Woman has only a handful because demand for her character has been so small.

Even her recent "revamp" at the hands of Jim Lee hasn't helped. Her wardrobe now comes straight out of the 90's Justice League looks (think Vibe, Gypsy, Black Canary, etc). But here's the thing: she has this massive potential to be a star but DC has no clue what to do with her. The JLA now has Supergirl, the JSA has Power Girl...I don't even think the Birds of Prey would let her in!

She's been rumored to have a movie in the works and a possible television series, but she just seems to have lost her star potential. Either put her back in the Justice League (possibly as leader), turn her into a super-villain (see how she'd really stand up against Superman), or just kill her off.

Blue Beetle

When Ted Kord died, it didn't take long for DC to immediately pass the mantle to a new character, with new powers and everything. They gave him his own series immediately and expected the best.

Now here we are, years later, and beyond a few guest shots on the "Brave and the Bold" cartoon he's pretty much proven himself unable to hold a title. Ted Kord got more page time last year (in the Booster Gold comic) than Reyes, and Ted's dead!

The interest really isn't there for this character. Again, a noble death for this character (perhaps saving the JLA or ironically at the hands of the newly-revived Maxwell Lord) might help his memory. It worked for Ted Kord!

Victoria F. Gaitán and Leslie Nolan: Different Shades of Fear

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While many kinds of narrative and visual art are grouped together into the genre of horror, fear comes in many different forms. Some horror is very explicit, shocking the audience with unrelenting, unpredictable bursts of violence and gore. Other horror takes a more subtle approach, getting under the skin through repeated suggestions, unexplained events, and pervasive atmospheres of dread and uncertainty. Covering both ends of this sinister spectrum are photographer Victoria F. Gaitán and painter Leslie Nolan, both of whom have exhibits that are currently on display in the Washington DC area.

Gaitán's still life photos are on display at the Artisphere in Arlington, VA in an exhibit entitled "Sweet-Meat Cherry-Whip Flip". In terms of horror, Gaitán's work is of a more shocking, overtly visceral nature. According to the Artisphere, "Victoria F. Gaitán's photographic series of flesh-and-blood still lifes visualize human subjects as meat puppets. The images are calling cards from the artist's explorations of internal worlds, illness, in-between states, shared delusions and hells, stillness, memory, interpretations of pain, private and public intimacies, trauma, beauty and conditioned responses." While Gaitán's photos (as seen in the example above) at first seem like snapshots of zombies running amok at the Food Network, her overall work is somewhat suggestive of the subgenre of "body horror", echoing the themes and visuals of David Cronenberg and Frank Henenlotter--albeit with food, not blood and guts. Gaitán will be at the Artisphere to discuss her work on February 25, and the "Sweet-Meat Cherry-Whip Flip" exhibit will be on display until March 12.


In contrast to Gaitán is Nolan's paintings at the Touchstone Gallery in Washington DC in an exhibit entitled "Off-Kilter". Unlike Gaitán's explicit visual approach, Nolan is all about mood. According to the Touchstone Gallery, "Leslie Nolan's color drenched figurative paintings capture the uncertainties of our world. ... There is nothing tentative about these paintings: Nolan's bold brush strokes and vivid colors create a blur between the real and the imagined, resulting in an impression of physical solidity threatened by emotional disintegration. These strong works convey a sense of society on the edge." Nolan's subtext of uncertainty and alienation (as seen in the example above) is similar to that found in the more symbolic, visually abstract films in the horror genre, such as Dark City and The Broken. It is also evocative of some of Edward Hooper's work, although with a much, much greater degree of expressionism. The "Off-Kilter" exhibit will be on display until January 30.